I'm writing to you this letter. A stament or perhaps a question of what has overcame us.  If only I were the one to be true and confess.  Something I just stress over how everything should and could have been.  Yet, "im yours" and I still feel like I'm not filling enough space.  I don't want to waste precious time. This may be the last, unless you can keep up with and understand me more and more. Goodnight. I'm afraid to tell you those short three words because I just don't know how to anymore with anyone. Especially those who matter the most.  


Love, 

Me

P.S. one day it'll be heaven.

Current Mood:

high

The Boy:
It's terrible how because of my shamful and regretful relationships in the past affects the way I handle them now.  To constantly assume the worse is just a habit. My trust in people, guys especially, isn't so strong. I promise it's not that much of my fault as it may seem. I know there's a whole other life to a person and I'll just have to handle that.  I'm seriously afraid of falling too hard for this one. If only he knew how much of a big deal it is to me. Considering there's only less than 2 months left of shool, and we're still getting to know each other, hurts my heart.

Dance:
Without a doubt dancing is always in my body. Always makes me feel like I belong.. somewhere. Gives me a reason to live each day. It's the purest joy of joys. I must say that it's hard to express that in the enviroment at school. I feel shunned by all my teachers and all the other dancers to the point where I don't even want to be seen.  No one expects anything out of me. 

Music:
Surprisingly, jazz and hip hop have been joyfully filling my ear drums lately.  Nice music to dance to as well.

Future Summer Plans:
Hopefully I will get to experience the hype of camping again, travelling around Europe with my girls, the whole San Francisco business with the dancers, then.. shit off to college to start the whole damn 4-year thing over again.

Current Mood:	anxiety attack
Current Music:	nina simone-ne me quitte pas